Tick-Tock, Your Biological Clock Is Calling.

So much in my life lately seems to be pointing at babies. Or rather making babies.
The movies that I've watched, the people I've come in contact with, the dreams I've had.

I feel you all know me well enough by now to know that being married is my greatest desire in life. The pursuit of making an everlasting love within the wonderful, sanctified bonds of marriage is my utmost desire.
So you know that it's rare for something to come along and put that dream in second place. But lately I've wanted a child so badly. I've wanted the process of getting pregnant, and spending nine months discovering how truly miraculous the human body is, that it can create another being within it's bones and then to watch the new little miracle grow and blossom with each minute.
All other thoughts, any musings which normally occupy my thoughts have all fallen to the wayside to make room for imagining raising a new human. A new human who will be so much better than I will ever be. A new human who will have a fuller life than I will ever have. A new human who will know the love of everything and everyone. I want to give my child more than I have ever had, or will ever have. Really, that is the hope of each parent. That their child will be better than them.
It's been said that the hope of each parent is to do a better job than their parents did with them. They only hope to do better so that they can produce a better outcome.

Knowing that I want my child to have more, and be more than I can ever have or be gives me infinite patience in this time of such dire wanting though. I can wait out my miracles, because I see that tip of the miraculous iceberg within my dreams and know that there is so much more under the surface.

My life is about others. I have come fully to halt at this conclusion. My life is nothing if I don't have my counterpart to share it with. And my life is nothing if I don't have my child to teach, and to watch grow, and to know that someday my child will have a child who they will teach and watch grow and want more for my grandchild than I wanted for them.
That's how I am going to change the world. By creating a lineage of infinite love.

It's so insane how much I already love my future family.